Your body starts cooling down as soon as you die, at a rate of 1.5 degrees Celsius per hour. Rigor Mortis sets in after six hours. That’s a problem for me. I passed on in a chair, seven hours ago, and I don’t know how they plan to get me into a coffin when I’m not all flat. Can they reverse the stiffening somehow? Do Lenor do a corpse softener? I doubt it, although their sensual infusions range has done wonders on my jeans recently. I’m a man of small pleasures. I was a man of small pleasures.
1) Mark Hamilton’s sister will call at 4:07 a.m. on June 18th the year you are 24, from Germany, where Mark was airlifted because of an IED. You’ll up when she calls, not because she calls, getting ready to go to work at the chain bakery “That loves to feed ‘ya.”
2) Sit on the edge of your bed, staring at her name on the Caller ID. Consider not answering. No good calls come before dawn. Not the year you’re 24. Not the year you’re 32 either.
The music begins immediately, as mother and daughter pull out seats on the patio. Lucy, hurried, wants this meal to be over so that she can join her friends at the pub. Janine, aware of her daughter’s impatience, sighs as she fusses with napkins that threaten to fly, like huge yellow birds, into the wind. It is that soft time before sunset, the sky etched with pink, paper-thin clouds, a warm breeze that carries the scent of tea-roses. A perfect evening for supper outdoors.
not for whom the bell tolls ... it tolls for THEE!"
You are formally invited to a memorial service on Tuesday, 8th October
to celebrate the existence of the six spooky stories chosen for our DEAD & BURIED event. Selecting terrifying tales in the
run up to Hallowe'en is always hard, but it's especially hard when so many of
the authors are new, young and full of promise.
We're sorry to have to relate
that the night will feature ghosts, murderers, mouldering corpses,
more ghosts, haunting music, zombies and even more ghosts.
Those of a nervous disposition are advised to leave the country, essentially.
ORDER OF SERVICE for DEAD & BURIED Death of an Urban Hermit by Matthew Parker Everlasting by Nigel Robinson White Van Men by David McGrath Instructions for Burying your Best
Friend by Liz N. Clift *NEW AUTHOR*
Dead and Dug Up by Jennifer Rickard *NEW
AUTHOR* Sorry for your Loss by Mary McCluskey *NEW AUTHOR*
There will also be trick-or-treat sweeties, pumpkin cupcakes (probably), a
positively bloodcurdling book quiz, and Arachne Press's latest anthology WEIRD
LIES, a selection of the best horror, sci-fi and fantasy from the League, will
be on sale. As ever, doors open at 7pm, show starts at 7.30 and it's a fiver on the door
with 20% off bottles of wine all night.
See you on the other side ...
Dead & Buried on Tue Oct 8th Downstairs at The Phoenix
Thanks to our faithful fans' nominations we were shortlisted (along with four other eminent & excellent events) in the Best Regular Spoken Word Night category at the Saboteur Awards 2016! We didn't win (though congrats to Manchester's Bad Language, who did) but we certainly enjoyed the awards party cocktails ...
INTERVIEW ON THE STATE OF THE ARTS
In celebration of our one hundredth event, the fine folks over at thestateofthearts.co.uk interviewed us about the secret of Liars' League's longevity, here.
BEST REGULAR SPOKEN WORD NIGHT AT SABOTEUR AWARDS
We got nominated, we canvassed, we voted, we hoped, we prayed. Then we went down to Oxford - along with our publishing partners Arachne Press - for the Saboteur Awards and came away with a gong each! We won Best Regular Spoken Word Night 2014 and Weird Lies won Best Anthology.
LL IN GUARDIAN TOP TEN
Liars' League is one of The Guardian's 10 Great Storytelling Nights, according to the paper's go-out-and-have-fun Do Something supplement, that is. And they should know. The article is here and mentions several other live lit events well worth checking out.
ARTICLE ABOUT US IN WORDSWITHJAM
Journalist Catriona Troth came along to our Twist & Turn night, reviewed it and interviewed Katy, Liam, Cliff and author/actor Carrie. See what she said in her article for WordsWithJam here.
BUY OUR AUTHORS' BOOKS!
Longtime contributors Niall Boyce, Jonathan Pinnock & Richard Smyth all have books out which you'd be well advised to buy, then read, then buy for others. All genres are catered for, from novels (Niall's Veronica Britton) and short stories (Jonathan's Dot Dash) to nonfiction (Richard's Bumfodder)
KATY LIAR'S DEBUT NOVEL
Liar Katy Darby's debut novel, a Victorian drama called The Unpierced Heart (previously titled The Whores' Asylum) is now out in Penguin paperback. It's had nice reviews in The Independent on Sunday, Sunday Times & Metro (4*).
OUR INTERVIEW WITH ANNEXE MAG!
They came, they saw, they asked us a bunch of interesting questions. Interview by Nick of Annexe Magazine with Katy of LL: here